Trigger Warning: This article includes references to sexual abuse.
Justin Baldoni is opening up about being left sexually traumatized at the hands of one of his ex-girlfriends. The It Ends With Us actor-director appeared on a wide-ranging episode of Elizabeth Day’s How to Fail podcast that debuted on December 4. He spoke candidly for the first time about being diagnosed with ADHD as an adult this year, among other topics.
At one point during the podcast, Baldoni revealed feeling conflicted after a toxic relationship he had in college. He divulged that he met a “beautiful young woman” while attending Long Beach State and fell right into a romantic relationship with her because he was trying to fill a void when, like a regular young adult, he felt he wasn’t good enough.
“It was a very bad relationship, and I kind of contorted myself and my personality to be what she wanted,” Baldoni shared. Identifying his actions as manifestations of manipulation by his girlfriend now, Baldoni recalled he lost all sense of self while being in that relationship, and “it all got very emotionally abusive” after a point.
The Jane the Virgin star noted that after he “experienced sexual trauma” in his relationship, he wrestled with the misfortune for the majority of his life, largely because he was made to believe by society that a woman could not sexually abuse a man; it could only always be the other way around.
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The star, who has previously been open about his Baha’i faith, said he was hoping to save himself for marriage, and that’s as detailed as he got into the story.
Baldoni said lines can always be crossed, and that’s what happened to him, though he did not immediately accept it, gaslighting himself into thinking whatever happened happened with his consent.
One day, however, with the help of his therapist, Baldoni was able to acknowledge his experience and overcome it.
The actor shared on the podcast that the relationship in question ended with cheating and infidelity, following which he left college and moved to L.A. to pursue acting.
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Baldoni is now married to his wife Emily, and the couple share two kids, Maiya, 9, and Maxwell, 7.
Baldoni’s latest film, It Ends With Us, which deals with similar tropes of abuse and gaslighting in relationships, will hit Netflix on December 9, nearly four months after releasing in theatres.
Besides Baldoni, the flick stars Blake Lively and Brandon Sklenar. It is based on Colleen Hoover’s bestselling novel of the same name.
If you need support or know someone who is struggling with domestic violence or assault or abuse, please reach out to your nearest mental health specialist, NGO or speak to someone about it. There are several helplines available for the same.
